If I am completely honest, I kind of thought that once I had gathered the courage to talk about my feelings with a stranger, that would be all I needed. That was the work. Sitting across the room from a therapist and reliving my nightmares was not easy. How could it that not be enough?

It’s hard to see something like that and not feel worse at the thought that this might not be the case with your own illness. As much as I hate to admit it, it makes me feel awful, even jealous, when I see stories about people who have suffered from depression at one point in their lives but no longer qualify for the diagnosis. The people who seemingly “beat it,” so to speak.

Due to the chronic nature of my illnesses, I have seen many doctors. Over time, I have learned what kind of care works best for me. I am not here to admonish any one specialty, but rather celebrate those doctors that stand above the rest, to provide great care and fulfill their Hippocratic oath thoroughly.

To help you wade through and shorten the process of finding the right care for you, I have put together a helpful list of what to avoid and what to embrace in a doctor. 

I cannot count the number of people I have found on the internet who claim to have medication-free cures, who got better by just eating right, exercising, talking to their pastor. You name it, someone has written a way to get around mental illness without having to do the dreaded taboo—take a pill.

Not only is there still a lot of stigma surrounding mental health, but the nature of some illnesses is that it’s easy enough to assume you have it under control, that you’re fine or insert your excuse here. That's why it's hard to argue with someone if they believe they are truly ok.