If I am completely honest, I kind of thought that once I had gathered the courage to talk about my feelings with a stranger, that would be all I needed. That was the work. Sitting across the room from a therapist and reliving my nightmares was not easy. How could it that not be enough?

While I do not define myself by my diagnoses, I have found that I do better when the people surrounding me are understanding, forgiving and generally those who assume the best in others. I hope to reflect such kind traits in my own behavior too. It took a lot of thinking before I was able to identify what truly matters when it comes to building friendships.

As much as it pains me to admit, I’ve made a lot of mistakes when it comes to helping my friends with mental illnesses. I deeply regret the friendships I have lost, when I reacted or behaved in a way that was what the person requesting love was expecting or needed at the time.
Here is how I have Mishandled some situations.

Before I broke up my goals, I was facing a roaring river, attempting to run across without drowning or getting hurt. With each goal, it was as if I set a stone. Once I jumped onto that stone, I placed another one before stepping forward. And so on, until I was on a path, with so much determination, that there was no way I was returning to the same shore. Even if I am not sure what is on the other shore, I knew I wanted to start moving towards it.

You won last night. I would say I hope you’re happy, but of course, I already know you’re not. Even though you left in a huff, satisfied with how you escalated things, I know you’ll be back. This morning I got the fight back in me and I’m mad about how you behaved. It seems silly to be communicating like this, but I wanted to get this letter out to you before you came back, so that you know where we stand going forward.